Bormet's Body Going on Strike

Dubai (AP)
Jon Bormet's body announced that it is going on strike today at Midnight Dubai Standard Time.
"I have had enough of this happy horseshit" said Body. "He drags me from airport to airport, I was supposed to have my ass planted in an airplane seat a couple of hours ago, and still we sit here, munching peanuts and drinking Amstel Lights for god's sake."
"This situation is really out of my control," said Bormet. "I can't help the fact that the flight is delayed at least 3 hours, my 3 hours of sleep in Islamabad just disappeared, and I am stuck here like a boot in pig shit in the spring time."
"Ibid," said Body. "You are the one who drug me out here--I am going to keep sneezing and coughing--just generally make your life miserable--until you get your head out of my butt and stop doing this stuff to me. And if you're not careful, I am going to turn the lights out for a bit, you will miss your flight, and NEVER get out of here."
Bormet remains understanding, but rejects the idea of a strike by Body. 'Hey, no one likes the situation we're in--but we just need to all hang in there together and try to work through this."
"I knew I should have walked to Islamabad from Ahmedabad".
“And what’s up with all of these cities ending in ‘abad’?”